Yesterday was September 4th, the 3 year anniversary of the death of our brother, Robert.  Mom had to remind me of that fact this morning at breakfast.  There wasn’t much comment on this anniversary from any of us, least of all Erik.   I started to think about John and Carol taking care of Bob in his last weeks of life.  That kind of commitment is extraordinary, and selfless, because of all the demands that a dying person places on the caregiver.  Keeping him at home, rather than hospice or the hospital, interacting with him with love and yes, with parental scolding at times – could any of us say we could do that?  I for one would say I could not.  I lack the emphathy and the confidence to pull off such a gift.  But then, I doubt John realized he had the capacity when he went to see Bob, fully unaware of what he was about to undertake.  He temporarily gave up his job (and his pay), his children and all of life’s responsibilities to perform this last chore for his brother.  Carol has a perfectly natural way of assuming that kind of responsibility – I marvel at that, and wish she had more of that self-possession now to show the world.  Maybe she takes that talent for granted – I guess, when it seems natural, that’s what you do.  But all I – we – can hope for is whatever good deeds we perform on earth somehow go to the big ledger in the sky when it’s our turn to die.